House Rules

Spring Break! It finally arrived. Year after year, I use Spring Break as an opportunity to cram in as much reading as possible, whether my family is squeezed into our minivan and on the road, riding ATVs and fishing in Arkansas, or just relaxing at home. This year, I did something different- I went away without my family. Freedom! What glorious freedom! No one telling me to sit up straight! No one telling me I should eat healthier! Florida, here I come!

Reading by the poolside in Florida began with a book by Jodi Picoult- House Rules. In general, I'm a Jodi fan- her books make me think beyond black and white, to where rules and laws are in shades of gray. But I've made a rule for myself- no back-to-back Jodi readings. Her books are just so depressing! I can't read two in a row or else I get mopey, unfocused, and generally a downer about everything.

But House Rules... it's got to be one of her best yet. It manages to avoid the usual Jodi depression: it's funny! The main character, Jacob, has Asperger's syndrome, a type of autism, and as such, the way he sees the world is refreshingly different. He lives with his mother, Emma, and his younger brother, Theo. He is tutored in social skills by a young woman, Jess. But when Jess is discovered dead, all the evidence seems to point to Jacob. What follows is a fascinating look into the autistic mind, a look at the American justice system, and a tale of a family struggling to stay together.

The way Jacob's perspective is written is very straightforward- no metaphors, no figurative language except similes. He often makes numbered lists of things, or lists reasons a, b, and c. He takes everything literally, which makes for some very cute and funny moments. Additionally, Jacob's relationship with his mother, brother, and other people in his life are different than any other I've read, because Jacob doesn't have the capacity to empathize.

Can you imagine how different our lives would be without empathizing? We wouldn't cry during movies or books anymore (I am a notorious crier- even the Jungle Book 2 brought me to tears), we wouldn't be able to establish good relationships- Jacob's mother Emma even doubts that he loves his own family. I can't imagine being Emma, centering her life around her son, and not knowing if he even loved her in return. What a thankless task! Yet for Emma, there is never any question of trading her son for one without Aspergers. That is real love.

House Rules is so named because of a characteristic of Jacob: he follows every rule precisely and cannot tell a lie. While reading it, I thought of my own family's "house rules":

Tell the truth.

Every object has a "home".

Don't be mean to your siblings.

No snacks before dinner.

Clean the house on Saturdays.

Take care of your siblings.

Treat your parents and your siblings with respect.

Do we follow them perfectly, like Jacob? No. And on that Spring Break, away from my family, I wasn't following my House Rules very well without them. Most of these House Rules transition easily into the real world, but I didn't take the trouble of doing so on my vacation. My hotel room was a wreck, I ate constantly, never cleaned. I fell into selfish habits, not thinking of the family I was staying with. My parents set up these House Rules for me to form habits early in life, knowing all of these were skills I would need later on. And it's taken me 16 years to realize it.

Rating: 4/5 stars. Highly recommended!